Just like rain when it falls,

I cried my heart out.

Just like wind passes by,

You came and dried my tears. 

And just like storm,

You went away without any warning. 

The clock stared from afar, watching how broken I am.

I wished for a very simple thing to God, universe, or whatever you want to call it. 

I just wanted to be rain. 

I just wanted to be wind. 

I just wanted to be with you. 

Is it wrong for me to wish for such things? 

Or the universe just feel tired because I keep on wishing for the same thing? 

The clock sighed and began to talk, "O' poor child, you are trapped."

I stared at the clock wondering what was the meaning behind his words.

"You are trapped in your own delusion. You are rain, child. You are wind. He is storm, he went away from you too fast, but he is with you. You still can feel his breath inside your veins. His heartbeat, his eyes, his voice, all of them live within your very own body." He said.

But I don't feel anything! Neither his breath nor his voice!

"O' poor child, you are wrong. Take a look at the sky."

I stared at the sky and saw nothing but white clouds.

I felt disappointed. 

Why did I listen to the clock anyway? 

But somehow... 

I felt something... different. 

What is it?

What is the thing that I've been searching all this time? 

Why do I always feel incomplete? 

Like a big part of me disappeared ruthlessly. 

Is it you? 

Is it your voice? 

Is it your soul? 

I don't know... 

The clock sighed again, "What you've been searching for is right beside you all this time."

No!

He's not here! 

He went away! Like a storm! Crushing my body into shreds! 

Why... am I alone?

Why... did you leave me? 

I just wanted to be rain...

I just wanted to be wind... 

So I can be with you. 

So I can be a part of you. 

So that when you disappear, I will disappear with you. 

The clock looked at me with tears dropped from his eyes.

"My poor child, let him go. I will help you. You don't have to search for him anymore. He is there, with you. He is there, inside your heart."

No!

The clock is a liar. 

I don't have anything inside me.

I am an infinite darkness.

Empty. 

Hollow. 

Cold. 

Lonely. 

I lost my light and I'm trapped inside this unbearable darkness. 

I want to disappear. 

The clock stared at me with a very sad eyes and said, "Then, I will let you go, child. If your soul already feel tired from this darkness, I will break you free. I will stop your time."

I finally smiled at the clock.

He finally understood what I want. 

Please, let me see you again.

Let me be with you. 

Forever, away from this thick darkness inside me. 

The clock stopped itself and began to crumble.

What's happening?

"O' poor child, when your time stops, I will disappear along with you. I am your time. If you live, I live. And if you die, I die." He said.

The clock gave me a tiny sad smile and disappeared in front of my eyes.

I didn't even say goodbye. 

Or thank you. 

My body started to disappear just like the clock.

Suddenly, something inside my heart began to stir. 

I felt something... warm. 

Tears immediately flowed from my eyes. 

I feel you. 

You were here. 

All this time. 

With me. 

You were within my reach. 

And yet, I chose to give up. 

When my body almost completely disappeared, I screamed my lungs out,

I'm sorry!!

Slowly, clear droplets began to fall from the sky.

The dark clouds appeared. 

The wind blew. 

Storm was coming.

She opened her eyes only to saw an endless darkness in front of her. It was really cold and damp.

A voice suddenly ran trough her ears and told her to walk. She felt a bit reluctant. The voice was so clear and soft, but it made her feel a little bit scared. 

He said, “This is abyss.”

Abyss?

What do you mean 'abyss'? 

Why am I here? 

What is happening? 

No matter how much she tried to speak, her voice never came out.

The voice said to her once again, “Walk.”

She began to take a small step carefully. But then, she felt a striking cold on the tip of her foot. She was scared. She took back her foot and stood still. In this infinite darkness, she couldn't see anything at all. She could only hear his voice inside her head. She was scared. Really really scared.

“This is abyss,” he said. “you live here.”

What do you mean?

I live here? 

But, where is this? 

“This is abyss,” he said again. “you will find your home.”

Home?

How? 

In this endless darkness? 

“This is abyss,” he said. “you can stay here.”

Suddenly, she felt something touched her face softly.

Who is it??

I’m scared! 

I want to get out from here! 

“Walk.”

The voice kept telling her to walk.

But where? 

“She knows.” He said.

Who?

“You know.”

Me? 

“I know.”

You?

“They know.”

Who??!

Answer me!!! 

Why don’t you answer me?! 

Why won’t my voice come out?! 

Help me... 

Somebody please help me... 

“They know.” He said again. 

She started to feel really frustrated. She wanted to smash everything if she could see anything right now. 

“I know.” He said.

What do you know???????

"She forgives you.” He said.

Who??

“You.”

Me? 

“Walk.”

She stayed in her spot, unable to do anything. Everything was so confusing. She was scared. She was confused. She was frustrated. She wanted to go home. 

“Wait.”

Wait for what?

The sound of footsteps were slowly getting closer. She stepped back, felt a little bit scared. 

Who is it?

“It’s me.” Said the same voice all over again.

Who are you??

“Abyss.” He answered.

Abyss?

“Me.”

Who??

“Yours.”

Mine?

“Heart.”

My heart? 

You are my heart? 

What does that mean? 

“Sssh.” He whispered. “She's coming.”

Who??

“Abyss.”

What?

What does that mean????? 

“I will go to the sea.” He said.

Sea?

“Sea is good. Sea is great.”

But why sea?

Never mind. 

Take me with you!! 

“Sea is cold. Sea is dark.”

Huh?

“Sea is lonely.” 

What do you mean?? 

“Sea is dark.”

No!

Sea is beautiful! 

It’s blue! 

It’s bright! 

“Sea is abyss.” He sounded a little bit sad.

No!

No!!! 

She covered her ears, didn’t want to hear his voice again. But no matter how much she tried to cover her ears, she kept hearing his voice. 

“Walk.” He said.

No.

I don’t want to walk. 

I’m scared. 

“Walk.” He said again. “She forgives you.”

Who??

“Let’s go.”

Where??

Slowly, she felt someone grabbed her hand. The hand was so cold, yet she felt a little bit relieved.  The hand pulled her and made her move from her spot. She was really scared, but she finally walked. 

“Walk.” He said again.

Slowly, she felt the wind touching her face.

Where are we going?

“She's coming for you.” He said.

Who?

“She forgives you.” He said again.

Who is she??

In a blink of an eye, she felt her body being swept away by a strong force. The cold inhuman hand grabbing her hand was finally letting her go. 

Where am I going??

I’m scared!! 

“She is good! She is great!” He shouted.

She could only hear his voice vaguely now.

“Let’s not meet again!” He shouted once again.

She wandered aimlessly in the middle of that strong force and endless darkness. In her head, she could only repeat his voice over and over again. He was the only one beside her the whole time. Who was he exactly?

Suddenly, the strong force stopped and she was stranded somewhere. From afar, she could see a dim light in front of her. She began to walk slowly towards that light. The light seemed so warm and nostalgic. And then, she disappeared into that little light. 

He stared at the disappearing girl with a sad smile on his face. In the end, she found her real home. And once again, he was alone. 

“Abyss is dark. Abyss is lonely.” He whispered. 

“Abyss is you. You are abyss. Abyss is the sea. The sea is abyss.”

"Let’s not meet again.”

A small tear fell from his eye as he turned away from the twinkling little light.

*

She opened her eyes and saw a vast sea in front of her. It was night. She was drenched. Nobody was there. Just her. Alone. 

She stood up and stared at the dark sea. A part of her heart disappeared along with the endless darkness. She was sad. She was hurt. But, she smiled. 

“Thank you.” She whispered.

She turned away from the beach and began to walk slowly, leaving that beautiful yet lonely sea behind.